An exasperated lady had just directed that precious barb at a scowling supermarket

butcher as he was slicing up a two-foot-long salami and the two then became

engaged in a snarky back-and-forth. My middle son was a witness to this exchange

and it became a family classic, providing many laughs and becoming the prompt

for many such stories years afterward.

Here’s how it came about: Virtually every weekend the four of us, often with a

host of parents and kids, would go to the local high school and play football and

lacrosse and soccer chase each other around on the wide-open fields for hours,

even in the colder months.

Part of this ritual was lunch, plain fare eaten at the field. On the day of salami

woman, we were at the grocery store getting provisions and it was the middle kid’s

turn to get lunch meat while the others got French bread and cream soda (like I

said, plain fare). He came back to us at the check-out counter and repeated in a

perfect mimic the entire encounter between the impatient lady and the annoyed

butcher.

We all loved it – it was a genuinely funny story and this sometimes-stoic son was

genuinely excited as he told it. I was so surprised and pleased with the recitation of

the scene that I told the boys they’d get a dollar every time they had a funny story

about something they’d seen. “See how your brother got that one? Boys, the world

is full of these kinds of situations and people and jokes. Keep your eyes and ears

open and go find them.” Obviously, the dollar was a hook but over the years it

became symbolic to both them and me - the real thrill was in them bringing back

something to share.

Of course, it helped that I often acted like a joker as well. When we’d go to a

hamburger place or Mexican restaurant or a pizza joint, I’d order a taco at the first,

a pizza at the second and a burger at the last. Then I’d make a confused scene

feigning surprise when I received the obvious answer to my question – “We don’t

serve that” -- from the waiter. The boys knew this nuttiness was going to play

out and would be giggling in anticipation of the whole routine. Hey, it wasn’t high

comedy but it was funny enough to us.

Once the eldest told us about walking through a parking lot and seeing a woman

accidentally back her car into another and when immediately challenged by the

other car owner – standing next to the fresh dent and the resulting debris on the

ground – the women said the dent “had always been there.” My kid was excited to

tell us and it was a funny story. The youngest is checking in for a soccer camp and

providing information and is asked,

“When is your birthday?” “Every year” he responds. Pay the man, Shirley.

And be ready to surprise them; again, always try to be loose yourself. During

halftime at one of the eldest son’s games, I was carrying a lacrosse stick I’d found

lying near a car in the parking lot. The middle kid and his friends walked by me on

the sidelines at halftime and my son’s face lit up in surprise. “Dad, what are you

doing with that stick?” I responded nonchalantly, “I’m gonna warm-up Wheeler,”

who was the varsity goalie.

Immediately, the kid and his entourage could see the whole scene was so patently

preposterous – the old man in a suit and tie, shuffling out on a field in front of 200

spectators to take practice shots on a premier goalie – that they began howling with

laughter. “Gonna warm up Wheeler” became a family staple. Of course I fell short

a few times going for the laugh but I was always trying.

The most important aspect of this whole exercise was that the boys were

consistently on the look-out for the funny situations, furthering their awareness and

contributing to their upbeat outlook. Our many times together in the everyday

world – and man, get it in your head that’s where we all live – could verge on

laugh-a-minute type affairs sometimes.

All three were and remain good natured kids, quick with a smile and seeking the

good. Let me tell you, this kind of attitude doesn’t just occur out of nowhere. It’s

learned through active example and repetition. Kids who are looking for a gag are

looking and in doing so are absorbing a lot more.

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